Series: The Winner's Trilogy

Synopsis:

War has begun. Arin is in the thick of it with untrustworthy new allies and the empire as his enemy. Though he has convinced himself that he no longer loves Kestrel, Arin hasn’t forgotten her, or how she became exactly the kind of person he has always despised. She cared more for the empire than she did for the lives of innocent people—and certainly more than she did for him.

At least, that’s what he thinks.

In the frozen north, Kestrel is a prisoner in a brutal work camp. As she searches desperately for a way to escape, she wishes Arin could know what she sacrificed for him. She wishes she could make the empire pay for what they’ve done to her.

But no one gets what they want just by wishing.

As the war intensifies, both Kestrel and Arin discover that the world is changing. The East is pitted against the West, and they are caught in between. With so much to lose, can anybody really win?

Unpopular opinion time. I just don’t care.

So, this probably comes as a shock to a lot of people. Me, Chelsea, rating a book within one of her FAVORITE series of all time anything below a four. Well, that, and everyone and their cousin thinks this is the best book in the trilogy.

While this story had it all, everything that I could EVER want and everything that I DO want: Action, peril, war, angsty romance. I mean, in a nutshell? This book was perfect….

But it wasn’t perfect for me.

Call me whiney. Call me selfish. Call me flakey, inconsistent, or the black sheep. But what everyone hated about the first two-Kestrel and Arin’s forbidden romance slowly blossoming around war and deceit and destruction and betrayal-I shipped. That’s why I even fell in love with this series, Goddamn it! The romance! DUH!

“Yes,” Arin said, “but even so, the risk for you is still different-“
“Stop saying that.”
“It is.” His face was unhappy. “There is a difference between you and me. If I die, you’ll survive. If you die, it will destroy me.”

And my thing is this: If a series is about war, and romance is in the background at all times, then it’s like this glorious…THING when it comes to fruition. It’s a bonus, it’s a plus, it’s like everything is right in the world. Peril is the forefront and the love comes after (Seven Realms, Chaos Walking Trilogy, etc. etc.)-this is something I understand and ADORE. But when book one and two had a somewhat consistent theme (one being the best, to me)-Kestrel and Arin falling in love-then book three is about 80% war…I can’t help but say it didn’t fit, for me, and I was disappointed-and bored. I hate having to say all this and my heart is broken.

*shrugs* But it is what it is.

“It’s not enough,” he said. It took her a moment to realize he was continuing his refusal and not responding to her thoughts, which were so loud in her head that she felt as if she’d shouted them.
She said, “What would be enough?”
Color mounted in his face.
“You can tell me,” she said.
“Ah,” he said. “Well. Me.”
“I don’t understand.”
“I want…you to want me.”

This was beautiful-I had TONS of feels. It took a direction I didn’t expect and I respect it…even loved it. But the war surrounding it took what I loved away from me and I guess it’s just not what I wanted. I won’t apologize for being a hopeless romantic who thrives for more. I am sad this one isn’t a favorite, but I’m really not surprised-book three in a trilogy is almost ALWAYS my least favorite, I just hoped that wouldn’t be the case for this. BUT-this series will always hold a piece of my soul and I will continually go back and re-read about my book boyfriend, Arin.

Favorites in order:

The Winner’s Curse
The Winner’s Crime
The Winner’s Kiss

Oh, and also, why do so many fucking horses have to die??? I mean…come on. Ugh.

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Synopsis:

Book two of the dazzling Winner's Trilogy is a fight to the death as Kestrel risks betrayal of country for love.

The engagement of Lady Kestrel to Valoria’s crown prince means one celebration after another. But to Kestrel it means living in a cage of her own making. As the wedding approaches, she aches to tell Arin the truth about her engagement…if she could only trust him. Yet can she even trust herself? For—unknown to Arin—Kestrel is becoming a skilled practitioner of deceit: an anonymous spy passing information to Herran, and close to uncovering a shocking secret.

As Arin enlists dangerous allies in the struggle to keep his country’s freedom, he can’t fight the suspicion that Kestrel knows more than she shows. In the end, it might not be a dagger in the dark that cuts him open, but the truth. And when that happens, Kestrel and Arin learn just how much their crimes will cost them.

“Sometimes you think you want something,” Arin told him, “when what you need is to let it go.”

Fucking seriously? Is this series incapable of not crushing my heart into a thousand tiny pieces after each installment ends?? A whirlwind of angst, heartbreak, heartache, doubt, and self-sacrifice to the FULLEST extent, I could barely breathe through most of this story. It was harsh. It was evil. There wasn’t a moment where I wasn’t sitting on the edge of my seat….Agh. Who am I kidding? I fucking loved it.

Like she had broken her own heart. Kestrel felt the pieces of her heart suddenly, as if love had been an object, something as frail as a bird’s egg, its shell an impossible cloudy pink. She saw the shock of it’s bloody yolk. She felt the shards of shell pricking her throat and lungs.

This installment, to me, was more about the sacrifices we make for love. It still had the forbidden love elements, sure, but a lot of the story was centered around heartbreak for Kestrel. And, essentially, heartbreak for me. It was so hard to already be in a bad mood and try to differentiate my emotions from Kestrel’s. I think that was my biggest struggle with this story-our emotions meshed together a little too well. So maybe in a different time or place I’d have given this a five, but for my mood this weekend, I don’t feel I got that ‘5’ feeling. But I digress.

“If you won’t be my friend, you’ll regret being my enemy.”
-Kestrel

Like I said before, this story was quite vastly different from the first book. The first book was all about how Kestrel bought Arin, how Arin loathed her for who she was and how she began to open up to him. How she would take him as an escort to functions and how he began to see how cunning, smart, wise, brave she was. We got to see him break down his barriers and earlier thoughts of how spoiled and privileged she was and, ultimately, fall madly in love with her…and she him. They developed a camaraderie built on crushed hopes and unrealistic dreams, but they loved deeply, all the same. It was beautiful and magnetic and it was most assuredly a favorite of 2014, for me. And while there was still a magnetic pull to this story, it was more devastating than anything. What would it be like to give up your one true love to keep him safe? What would it be like to have him begging you to be honest, begging you to tell him what he did wrong? How would that make you feel when, in fact, he had done nothing wrong but steal your heart?

He saw her honesty with him. She offered it like a cup of clear water that he drank deep.
Her tears, glinting in the dark.
Her fierce creature of a mind: sleek and sharp-clawed and utterly unwilling to be caught.
Arin saw Kestrel step between him and punishment as if it meant nothing instead of everything.

I was so emotionally charged while I read this story. I was covering my mouth, gasping out loud, and pulling my hair out. There was never a good end to this story. I knew that. Kestrel knew that. Arin didn’t, but boy did he begin to see it that way. The King was an evil, conniving son of a bitch, and he was the main reason I couldn’t breathe through this story. He watched Kestrel’s every move. He watched Arin’s every move. He watched his son’s every move…and when Kestrel’s father came back into the story, it only added an extra layer of oh shit and me pulling more of my hair out.

“Lower your voice,” Kestrel hissed at Arin. “Stop being so-”
“Inconvenient?”
“Frankly, yes.”
His smile came: quick, true, surprised by itself. Then changing, and slow.”I could be worse.”
“I am sure.”
“I could tell you how.”

Loyalty is key. Stay loyal? Stay alive. Who’s the most loyal to the crown? A general would be, one would think. Name a general-Kestrel’s father. Name someone who isn’t truly loyal to the crown-Hmmmm, Kestrel? Add Arin to the mix. Add a little emotional angst because Arin just doesn’t know what he did wrong. Maybe add some deceit, lies, betrayals. Put them all in a palace with spies and evil knights who do the King’s bad deeds behind closed doors. Add some sneaking around and trying to help Arin out, secretly, behind the King’s back…and what do you have??? You have one of hell of a story on your hands, my friends.

Pain seared from forehead to cheek. Red flooded Arin’s left eye. He was blinking, he was half-blind, he was desperate to know if someone can still blink if an eye has been gouged out. He wept blood. His face had split. He could feel air inside the parted flesh, and his hand instinctively went to it.

Lies. Lies lies lies lies lies. Secrets and secrets and misunderstandings and assumptions and lots of heartbreak. Hope….bleak hope. And then that door closes on you, too. I still think book one was way more addicting for me, but I also think my mood was effected this weekend for my own personal reasons. I WILL be reading this series again before the final release, and I wouldn’t be at all surprised to be giving this a five next time. Read these-they are beyond beautiful and the writing is still so poetic….and they’ll rip your heart to shreds, just like mine.

*****

COME TO MAMA

I’ve been waiting a year for this Muaha!