Tag: Young Adult (Page 104 of 159)

BOOK REVIEW – Shadowfell (Shadowfell #1) by Juliet Marillier

July 24, 2015 / Anna

Shadowfell (Shadowfell #1)
by Juliet Marillier
Purchase on: Amazon, iBooks
Add to: Goodreads

Synopsis:
Sixteen-year-old Neryn is alone in the land of Alban, where the oppressive king has ordered anyone with magical strengths captured and brought before him. Eager to hide her own canny skill--a uniquely powerful ability to communicate with the fairy-like Good Folk--Neryn sets out for the legendary Shadowfell, a home and training ground for a secret rebel group determined to overthrow the evil King Keldec.

During her dangerous journey, she receives aid from the Good Folk, who tell her she must pass a series of tests in order to recognize her full potential. She also finds help from a handsome young man, Flint, who rescues her from certain death--but whose motives in doing so remain unclear. Neryn struggles to trust her only allies. They both hint that she alone may be the key to Alban's release from Keldec's rule. Homeless, unsure of who to trust, and trapped in an empire determined to crush her, Neryn must make it to Shadowfell not only to save herself, but to save Alban.

If I had to choose a word to describe it I’d say that this book is … quiet. Look, quiet is not necessarily a bad thing – it brings a different atmosphere along its path, almost soothing and completely enchanting.

① There is a lot of walking in this book, and when I say a lot, picture Frodo and Sam wandering in the Middle-Earth. That kind of walking.

② The plot is incredibly repetitive, the whole book revolving around the fact that a)Neryn has to go to Shadowfell, b)she doesn’t trust (with reasons) Flint, c)she has a power that makes her able to see and talk with fairies and other magical creatures. I won’t lie to you, this is highly frustrating at times.

③ I might have been under a spell because despite the walking, despite the repetitions, I was never bored, but enchanted and enthralled. Will it be the same thing for you? Fuck if I know. I can’t say without doubt that you won’t be dying from boredom, but I sure didn’t, not for a second, and it was a page-turner for me (trust me, I’m astonished).

① Neryn is afraid but fierce, independent, and believable – she wants to be strong but doesn’t succeed all the time and that’s GREAT. She doesn’t trust the first guy coming (I confess that I would have LOVED that she trusts Flint on sight, but hey, I’m weak, she was right, okay, I stop sulking – maybe). And if she sometimes takes risks, it’s only because she wants to overcome the obstacles she meets during her quest.

“Weapons sharp. Backs straight. Hearts high”

If I had some concerns about her personality at the beginning, her courage and her perseverance definitely won me along the way.

② Flint is the best kind of characters : hard to trust, complex, morally ambiguous , conflicted. I can’t express how much I’m eager to learn more about him.

“Become my friend and you embrace a nightmare. I don’t wish that on anyone.”

I might be crazy, because I felt attracted to this tortured guy from the start. *shrug*

③ The Little Folk speaks in a dialect that can be unsettling at first :

“Bide ye here awhile. Dinna be afeart o’ the shadows; they canna harm ye. Sit quiet; ye look weary tae the bane. I willna be lang.”

Strangely, it didn’t bother me because a)it’s rare and 2)it became easy to translate pretty fast. Don’t ask me, I have no idea why, except maybe because it makes sense : contrary to many books that use a dialect, the author goes beyond throwing some words here and there, but uses a coherent language, and once the reader has digested the initial surprise, it becomes more and more easy to follow their conversations.

① The writing is really, really good, not heavy and flows smoothly. As far as I’m concerned, the way Juliet Marillier writes played a large role in determining my enjoyment.

② Nothing is ever as straightforward as it seems : indeed while at the beginning the boundaries between good and evil seem to be thick and steady, we quickly realize that nothing is as simple as it appears. Good reasons can lead to bad choices, and the contrary is also true. This world is brutal, unforgiving, and sometimes there’s no such thing as a right choice. To be frank, I can’t wait to learn more about this world.

③ Although I can’t say when this event occurred, in the end I care about every one of these characters ~~especially Flint. God I love him~~, and in my opinion that’s perhaps the most important of all things, don’t you think?

PS. I don’t know why the blurb says that Flint is handsome because he’s not, and that’s one of the things I loved about him.

BOOK REVIEW – Finding Audrey by Sophie Kinsella

July 23, 2015 / Anna

Finding Audrey by Sophie Kinsella
Purchase on: Amazon, iBooks
Add to: Goodreads

Synopsis:
From the #1 New York Times bestselling author of the Shopaholic series comes a terrific blend of comedy, romance, and psychological recovery in a contemporary YA novel sure to inspire and entertain.

An anxiety disorder disrupts fourteen-year-old Audrey’s daily life. She has been making slow but steady progress with Dr. Sarah, but when Audrey meets Linus, her brother’s gaming teammate, she is energized. She connects with him. Audrey can talk through her fears with Linus in a way she’s never been able to do with anyone before. As their friendship deepens and her recovery gains momentum, a sweet romantic connection develops, one that helps not just Audrey but also her entire family.

Okay, first : I love Kinsella’s works (thought it was important to ~~say~~ write). Now, her books are the first ones I read in English, so, you know, I might need to reread them some day (I mean duh. I’m not a language snowflake). Anyway : Kinsella? She gets my humor. I mean not me me, but you get it right? Her books make me laugh. They’re refreshing. Like candies. Okay, maybe not like candies – Well, let’s say that they put me in the Kinsella bubble.

What is it? Just look, it’s just like life, but it’s fun :

Because what I love even more in them is the undercurrent of reality they hide behind the laughs. This is something that works for me, because I’m not (well, rarely) a full-angst girl. I just can’t. I read a book filled with angst and I just want to bang my head on the wall you know? So, Kinsella? Perfect. I know that some readers found shocking that she could deal with such a heavy issue – Audrey’s anxiety disorder – in a funny way. I’m not, not one bit, because it stays respectful. Full of empathy. Honest. True. And it shows something that I find necessary : people aren’t their disorder. They’re not entirely defined by it. Yes, it’s important.

Audrey suffers from an anxiety disorder : she can neither leave the house nor stare into people’s eyes. Actually I’m with her on this : eyes scare me too. I mean, she does have a point : when you look carefully at people you give them the power and the means to stare back. I hate when strangers stare right into my eyes. I’m not shy or anxious. My eyes are just my personal space. Leave it. I also hate when people I don’t know touch me. Like for real. Did you need to touch my arm to ask me what time is it? Hell no you didn’t. It’s not that I don’t like people – I’m comfortable enough – but I like my personal space more. Anyway. Audrey. I loved her. She was witty, realistic and relatable. She made me laugh and yeah, tear out a bit at some point. Even if it’s not always easy, she fights, she never gives up and I loved that about her. For me, she’s brave.

► It’s not a secret that I love family dynamics when they’re done well. SPOILER ALERT : They are. Every member of the family is flawed but so endearing and supportive, I spent such a great time following them.

● Felix made me miss my Kindergarten teaching years : 4 years old is such a great age. Really. They’re happy all the time (except when they’re not, but then, it’s short).

● Frank the gamer : I feel you. Go explain to people that no, gaming doesn’t make you crazy. Sigh. He completely won me with his witty comments.

● By the way, I’m so going to throw this book at my mum. Yes, kindly (is that what you think of me? Come on). Indeed Audrey’s mum Daily Mail obsession cracked me up, and yes, I can relate. Here’s how our mother-daughter phone calls go :

Mum : Have you bought curcuma/vitamines/royal jelly/magical product as I told you?
Anna : [awkward silence when I try to remember why the fuck I’m supposed to buy that] Hmm not yet (I mean, come on)
Mum : But you need it! There’s plenty of [add some information about how it’s gonna boost my health] in it. I saw this [show/paper/documentary] the other day and [add some descriptions about how freaking amazing this stuff is]
Anna : Okay. I’ll do it. (not really)

Two days later

Mum : Have you bought [add magical product sub-mentioned] as I told you?
Anna : Yes (not really)
Mum : I’m sure you’re already feeling better right?
Anna : I guess. So, [add some topic changer – You name it. Any word, really]

I love my mum. But yeah, that’s kind of exhausting. And the magnesium. OMG, the magnesium. But reading about this kind of character? Hilarious. Mum, I’m writing a book about you (not really).

Love interest? Adorable. Smile-inducing. I have no idea why I’m writing one-word sentences. I might be lazy. Major information : he write notes. End of story.

Just a thing : Linus? What’s this name? I kept thinking “Linux” and that was just so weird *shakes head*

● I already stated that I loved when authors used different writing formats and lucky me! Kinsella does it all the time : messages, notes, movie script : I eat that stuff, and Finding Audrey was right up my alley.

● Oh, and – the dialogues are fantastic and feel real. Hilarious. I know, I have to stop using that word. Someday (not when I talk about Kinsella)

► Let’s have a little brainstorming okay? (God. I hate that word. My fellow French use it all the freaking time for no reason. Hello, remue-méninges, you people)

That’s it. Is that really a brainstorming? Fuck if I know (in fact I do. It’s not. Not really. I mean. Who cares?)

“I think what I’ve realized is, life is all about climbing up, slipping down, and picking yourself up again. And it doesn’t matter if you slip down. As long as you’re kind of heading more or less upwards. That’s all you can hope for. More or less upwards.”

Such a great journey to follow. ~~And sorry for the messy review but I did warn you didn’t I?~~

BOOK REVIEW – The Seers (Holders #2) by Julianna Scott

July 21, 2015 / Anna

The Seers (Holders #2)
by Julianna Scott
Purchase on: Amazon
Add to: Goodreads

Synopsis:
After nearly being drained of her ability and betrayed by a man her father trusted, Becca Ingle was left with one clue — Ciaran Shea. He holds the key to the downfall of the power-mad Holder, Darragh, and can ensure the safety of both Holder and Human kind alike... but is he willing to help?

Becca, Alex, Jocelyn, and Cormac set out for Adare Manor to meet with the Bhunaidh, an aristocratic group of pure blooded Holders of whom Ciaran is a rumored member. However, when Becca discovers that they might not be the only ones after the information Ciaran has, everyone begins to wonder if Bhunaidh might not be as uninvolved with Darragh as they claim.

A race to uncover Ciaran’s secrets begins, where the line between friend and foe is blurred, and everyone seems to have their own agenda. Becca will have to call on every ability at her disposal to uncover the truth, all the while knowing that sometimes the answer is more dangerous than the question.

► I’m not a stalker. No, no, really, I’m not. Yet I’ll stalk Julianna Scott’s blog for sure to know when the next book will come out. Yes, it’s that good. Why, I think I can safely say that I’m pretty obsessed with this (underread!) series right now.

➊ I’m shamelessly in love with Alex, because he is a wonderful male lead. Period.

Okay, want to know more? What can I say, the guy blushes, is loyal and trusting but oh so humanly insecure sometimes, he cares deeply about his friends and his love for Becca is maybe one of the most adorable thing I’ve had the opportunity to see. I must admit that at this point I wasn’t far from the obsession : the tiniest gesture or conversation made me smile so big, I probably looked like a moron, but oh well : he made my heart beat faster and to be frank, it’s quite rare. In a word, here’s a male lead like I would want to find more often in my YA books as he represents a refreshing change from the asshole/controlling guys we often find in PNR. I mean, I do like a snarky evil from now and then, but I’m not immune to this kind of charming love interest, even more because he does manage to make me laugh, in his quiet and non show-off kind of way.

➋ Becca isn’t flawless, yet it made her very relatable and believable : she’s meaning to do whatever it takes to help and protect those she loves, but sometimes it’s just too hard, you know? She’s no hero, but a regular girl who happens to have powers and for that I’m grateful. I loved to see her discovering her abilities little by little, overwhelmed but eager to do the best she can. Moreover, she can’t stand bullies and doesn’t hesitate to stand for people who don’t get a say in the matter and I must confess that I was grinning hard each time she would have told someone to get lost. My only complaint would be that sometimes Becca comes as a little TSTL – not too bad, otherwise I would not have enjoyed the book, but she did trust a little too easily for my taste at some point, and perhaps she should keep her temper in check sometimes…

I mean, YOU STUPID!

But then, she is believably flawed, that’s why I could overtake it, because I have no idea how I would have reacted in her place… Easier said than done, huh?

➌ Moreover, the development of Becca and Alex’s relationship was great and really well-handled in my opinion. Indeed after book 1 we could have feared that unnecessary drama or overcheesery (I know, it’s not a word) was coming but fortunately, it never happened. I love them together.

➍ Trust issues and complots. Remember how I found The Holders predictable? Nothing like that in The Seers, where the story kept me captivated and managed to surprise me along the way : the characters have no idea who they can trust, and as the witnesses of this masquerade, we don’t either. Truth be told, it’s maybe one of my favorite kind of plot, so I was really pleased by all the developments this sequel offers us. Not to mention that I found the atmosphere a little darker and even creepy at some occasions : it is very promising for the future of the series, isn’t it?

➎ Concerning the secondary characters, we get to meet several interesting new ones, but shhhh – I can’t say more otherwise I would spoil all the fun for you and we wouldn’t want that now would we?

However, and on this I second what Emily said in her review, I would have wanted to see other female characters grow in importance. While Chloe stays nice but dismissed still too often (though it might change in the future), I didn’t like the addition of Shannon, since she was one dimensional and well, our stereotypical bitch : this kind of character never fail to annoy me because they don’t ring true, especially when the “hate” is instantaneous. However, I did appreciate that the drama didn’t involve Alex – Yeah, I *might* be a little overprotective of the guy. Meet him and you will understand, trust me.

➏ As in the first book, the writing is addictive and I find myself wanting to know more and more… Now I have a millions questions and FOR PETE SAKE WHEN WILL I KNOOOW?? TELL MEEEEEEE!!!

► In a word, if you love YA PNR, I don’t see why you couldn’t love these books. That’s true, there is romance and the plot is predictable at some points, especially in the first book, but isn’t always more or less the case in that genre? What I can say is what you won’t find : you won’t find an asshole as a hero, you won’t find an annoying heroine who spends her time melting on the floor because of the asshole mentioned above, and you won’t find boredom for sure. What are you waiting for?

BOOK REVIEW – The Holders (Holders #1) by Julianna Scott

July 17, 2015 / Anna

The Holders (Holders #1)
by Julianna Scott
Purchase on: Amazon, iBooks
Add to: Goodreads

Synopsis:
17-year-old Becca spent her whole life protecting her brother from, well, everything. The abandonment of their father, the so called 'experts' who insist that voices in his head are unnatural and must be dealt with, and the constant threat of being taken away to some hospital and studied like an animal. When two representatives appear claiming to have the answers to Ryland's perceived problem, Becca doesn't buy it for one second. That is until they seem to know things about Ryland and about Becca and Ryland's family, that forces Becca to concede that there may be more to these people than meets the eye. Though still highly skeptical, Becca agrees to do what's best for Ryland.

What they find at St. Brigid's is a world beyond their imagination. Little by little they piece together the information of their family's heritage, their estranged Father, and the legend of the Holder race that decrees Ryland is the one they've been waiting for. However, they are all--especially Becca--in for a surprise that will change what they thought they knew about themselves and their kind.

☠ Warning : the plot is VERY similar to X-men at first but it didn’t bother me, because I get the impression that the author actually acknowledges it by several references. Secondly it’s just…. so FUN, and if some readers find that fun is cheap, I don’t : after trying a tons of books lately, I can say without doubts that fun isn’t easy to find. Moreover, there are some magical additions that appealed to me (alchemy, for example) and the great villain, Darragh, while sharing some particularities with both Magneto and Sylar from Heroes, is more complex that I imagined at first. Finally, I don’t mind inspirations of other works when it’s well-done and when the author uses them as a background to create a compelling and original story. In my opinion it was the case here, and the way the story unfolded satisfied me.

But perhaps the most important thing to consider is the fact that The Holders managed to get me involved in Rebecca and Rylan’s story at any time during my read : I was hooked from page one, and that’s something because I started almost 10 books yesterday. ~~Yes, 10! So freaking annoying~~. The writing style was compelling, and the pacing pretty fast, as there wasn’t any dull moment and I couldn’t have stopped reading for the life of me.

Sure, some of the plot twists were glaringly obvious, yet instead of spoiling my read, they made it an almost better experience because the knowing created an expectation in me that improved my read, you know? Therefore strangely, I never minded the predictability.

As for the settings, most of the story takes place in St Brigid, a special academy standing in Ireland. While I appreciated the fact that the descriptions weren’t all over the place (I never had a huge patience for that, to my literature teachers’ dismay) I have to admit that while quite atmospheric at times it never reached the level of others books set in Ireland I read. Indeed the settings aren’t the main focus here, as we don’t get to travel and wander a lot. Therefore don’t expect to be transported otherwise you would be disappointed. This being said, I remained curious along the way, eager to catch any occasion to learn something about it, so it’s almost a win for me. And to be frank, I read enough fantasy to be satisfied on that count, and this kind of book is refreshing, not to mention that everything actually makes sense (you would be surprised to see how many books TRY to create a world-building and FAIL because it’s just too confusing and messy).

As far as the characters are concerned, the only thing I can that is that I loved them because they all were very likeable and felt genuine. Indeed Becca’s voice was refreshing and believable for a 17 years-old-girl : she can be immature at times but never dumb or annoying. What defines her the most is her strong love and mean to protect her brother and her mother, and for this I loved her.

“It’s just a school,” the younger man interrupted, in what I can only imagine was his best peacekeeper voice. “I promise.”
“You promise? What are we, twelve? Next I suppose you’re going to pinky swear me that this will all be for his own good, and expect me to let you take him?”

Well, yeah, she can be kind of ill-tempered sometimes, but it’s for a good reason, I promise! ~~Pinky swear 😛~~

Alex has been designed for us to crush on him and strangely… I crushed on him. Hey, I never said I was immune to an adorable superpowered guy who can create illusions larger than life. I mean, seriously, the guy must rock on dates. Duh. Moreover, he’s loyal, caring, blushes all the time and frankly? So sweet and kind and AWW, I adore him.

Concerning the romance, I realize how easy it would be for me to take all the information at once and shows something else entirely. The truth is, if some aspects are part of what I usually don’t like in romances, here it worked. In my opinion here lies the talent of an author : when the peeves we can see in a book feel so right that we don’t care nonetheless. How could I bother about objective complains if in my heart I wouldn’t have wanted the story to be different? It would be so unfair of me – I won’t.

First Becca’s instant-crush on Alex, which could have been extremely annoying, strangely wasn’t because she kept it in check, let’s say. She’s well aware that she isn’t supposed to daydream about him and frankly, her take on the situation was refreshing. Yes, she has a crush. So what? Who never had? ~~I might had a crush on him too~~ As soon as it never morphs her in a somewhat pathetic and dumb heroine, but she stays focused on her goals, how can I complain? And as I already said, the guy is charming, and as we get to see their relationship growing from friendship to… something else, I didn’t mind.

Hey, guess what? It even contains a plot twist I never like View Spoiler » but I was so engrossed in their relationship that I didn’t care and shipped them hard nonetheless.

Finally, as I said earlier, this story also deals with family bounds and friendship. First of all, I absolutely adored the heart-warming relationship between Becca and her brother : it’s when I read books like this that I realize how much I have changed these past few years. When I was a teenager and my early 20s, I wasn’t a kid person – like, at all. They annoyed me, and I didn’t get all the fuss was about them, frankly. And then, well, I became a teacher, and most of my daily interactions are with children. What did I realize? That I liked talking with kids – that they were often more open-minded than the adults around us and that we underestimated grandly what they could understand. Therefore while I would have hated the addition of the little brother some years ago, I have to admit that today, I loved it, even more because in my opinion he talked like a 10 years old and not as if he was 5 (yes, because unfortunately that happens often in books)

Moreover, the friendship between Becca, Chloe, and really, all the side characters we meet was adorable and smile inducing : It won’t surprise you to know that I love when my heroines care about their family and have actual friends. Because in the end, what this story says us is that even though you’re different, there are people out there who care about you and who love you for who you really are – it can seem cheesy, but in our cynical world, sometimes it’s good to remember it, don’t you think?

► To sum up, The Holders came as a surprise as it kept me enthralled until the very end. Does it really deserve 4.5 stars? I don’t know. Do I care? Nope, because it got me out of my reading slump and for this I’m really, really grateful.

Above that, contrary to many series I read lately, I won’t be able to wait before starting the sequel : that says it all, doesn’t it?

BOOK REVIEW – What You Left Behind by Jessica Verdi

July 15, 2015 / Anna

What You Left Behind by Jessica Verdi
Purchase on: Amazon, iBooks
Add to: Goodreads

Synopsis:
It’s all Ryden’s fault. If he hadn’t gotten Meg pregnant, she would have never stopped her chemo treatments and would still be alive. Instead, he’s failing fatherhood one dirty diaper at a time. And it’s not like he’s had time to grieve while struggling to care for their infant daughter, start his senior year, and earn the soccer scholarship he needs to go to college.

The one person who makes Ryden feel like his old self is Joni. She’s fun and energetic—and doesn’t know he has a baby. But the more time they spend together, the harder it becomes to keep his two worlds separate. Finding one of Meg’s journals only stirs up old emotions, and Ryden’s convinced Meg left other notebooks for him to find, some message to help his new life make sense. But how is he going to have a future if he can’t let go of the past?

“Why don’t I ever seem to know what the right thing is? I hate you, brain.”

Warning: It’s been really, really difficult for me to gather my thoughts about this book and I put a lot of me in this review, because I needed this personal insight to express what worked and didn’t work for me in Ryden’s story. Please feel free to disagree with my opinions.

What You Left Behind was such a realistic, infuriating and heartbreaking young-adult story – I loved what I think the author was trying to say but I didn’t enjoy the story.

✔ First of all, I loved that the issues weren’t sugared, even if I can see how people will maybe feel uncomfortable with it : it deals with abortion, raising a child alone, loss and family bounds. I loved how realistic and daring it was : daring because sometimes I get the impression that authors don’t dare to talk about this kind of subjects because they are, by essence, dividing people, especially in America (forgive me for this possible simplification : it’s only how I perceive your public debate, because we just don’t have this kind of debate in France – not on that level anyway).

Jessica Verdi has the guts to offer us a different kind of story, and for that, I’m grateful. Sometimes life is more complicated than right or wrong. It’s my personal opinion, so take it or leave it, but I will never think that there is a right or a wrong answer when it comes to abortion. To me it’s a matter of personal choice, and I will never deny the right to abort. And if there isn’t any abortion here (obviously, because Ryden is a single father), yes, they thought about it. Yes, I understand why. Yes, for me this book is asking the right questions. Ryden is such a believable and realistic character : oh, no, he doesn’t grow up right away, and the choices he makes are sometimes messed-up. Now, do you really think that people are always able to change in a heartbeat, at seventeen? I don’t. So, yeah, even though he annoyed the crap out of me sometimes (more on this later), even though I wanted to shake him, I understood and cared for him at the beginning – until I didn’t anymore.

What you need to know is that Meg’s pregnancy killed her, and that she knew it was meant to happen. So, yeah, Ryden is mad and resentful – he still is, even though his daughter is here. So if you feel it could be a too big issue for you, don’t read it, because Ryden is realistic and don’t act like he’s been touched by grace because he became a father. He’s immature, SELFISH, heartbroken, somewhat delusional, and does mistake after mistake.

► I certainly didn’t agree with all the choices Ryden made, especially when it comes to his little daughter.

OMG you can’t possibly imagine the number of times I wanted to YELL at him TO GO TAKE CARE OF HIS DAUGHTER DAMMIT!!

He infuriated me. He maddened me. You want to know the truth? Call me a cold-hearted bitch, but in the end, I kind of hated him.

But the fact is, I didn’t need to agree with him, because it’s not my story : It’s Ryden’s, and I accepted it as such. Here’s a real coming of age story, where the main character evolves. Here’s a character I can say, without doubt, that his flaws are fucking REALISTIC.

✘ Sadly, I didn’t care about the romance.

Let’s get this straight : if some readers found weird and even shocking that Ryden was able to fall in love with another girl seven months after his loss, I didn’t, and that’s not WHY I didn’t like the romance.

I didn’t find it shocking because I lived it. And like I’ve said to these judgmental people nearly seven years ago : don’t try to understand how an heart can react, because you can’t. Trust life.

This book is about closure, the one we don’t always seek but that we need to move on, and when Ryden read Meg’s journal it’s what it felt like to me : searching closure, getting ripped of the stupid guilt we feel when we’re the “survivor”. I always wondered if people realized how much they keep the guilt alive when they act as if it was abnormal, coldhearted to start a new relationship after a loss. Trust me, we’re already well aware of the hidden rules that say that you can’t be in an healthy relationship less than a year after a loss. Oh, of course, people don’t openly say that you can’t be in a relationship. Nah. People say that it’s for the best, that they’re worried about you and your possible confusion (that people think that we can just mistake a love for another is beyond me).

But the truth is, they don’t know shit. That’s why I absolutely ADORED that Francesca Verdi dared to deal with such a secretly sensitive subject as love after loss, and yes, I wanted to ship Ryden and Joni hard. On this, I’m on the life team. Always and forever.

However, as much as I wanted to care about their relationship, sadly, the romance didn’t work for me, mostly for 2 reasons :

1) We don’t quite get enough Joni time to care about her as a character and in my opinion their love-story is only sketched here and stays on a superficial level.
2) The lying : It took way too much time to Ryden to tell the truth, and I didn’t like the fact that their whole relationship was built around a LIE. And what lie! She doesn’t even know that he has a daughter during most of the book! Of course it induced unnecessary drama, and I have a thing : I loathe unnecessary drama, especially when it’s created by miscommunications. It drives me crazy.

✘ But what leads me to give this rating is the fact that I didn’t enjoy my read. Trust me, I can handle infuriating and even evil characters (Jorg! I love you!) and the darkest parts of the human mind don’t scare me (in books. They don’t scare me in books) but I need to find a balance to enjoy a book, whether it’s humor or endearment and I never managed to do this here. Oh, yes, I felt many emotions, I have to give it that : Anger, despair, sadness, annoyance, oh and did I say anger? Yeah? The only moments I felt something else where the passages with Ryden’s mother (who rocks) and when Ryden was taking care of his daughter (so rare).

► I have to take into account that it took me ages to finish it, since I couldn’t stop putting it on hold. I almost always read books in a day or two, so, yeah, not my usual reaction here. The truth is, I always got a feeling of uneasiness when I tried to resume it and it disturbed me. No, scratch that : I WAS SO FUCKING MAD IT HURT. Because REALLY? The day-care scene? It destroyed me. I tried and tried and tried and tried to find the empathy in me to understand Ryden’s reactions and on some level I could, but putain de bordel de merde. There’s a moment guy you have to GROW THE FUCK UP. It’s hard, it hurts like hell, but you have to. I couldn’t stop picturing all these kiddos in the room crying and how he relied on everyone to take HIS responsibilities and – I just couldn’t handle it anymore. I had to stop. Again. Until I took the time to finish it and then, frankly? I hated the last 30%. I hated everything that went downhill, and at this point I was so much pissed that I hated the resolutions too. It was too late for me.

Of course what made me lost it is a spoiler (because I’m lucky like that) so I can’t talk about it here – the only thing I can say, and it’s my honest and strong opinion, is this : YES, sometimes to have a child is SELFISH. I don’t live in a fairytale. I see children who are neglected every day. They suffer from it.

View Spoiler »

► So, RATING?

A 3 stars rating would have meant that I liked it. I didn’t, not really, and in the end I felt depressed and angry. But then, I’m still able to acknowledge the risks Jessica Verdi took, and Ryden’s voice was really realistic, so, yeah, 2.5 it is, for now.