Author: Chelsea (Page 14 of 111)

BOOK REVIEW: Fireblood (Frostblood Saga #2) by Elly Blake

February 11, 2019 / Chelsea / 4 Comments

Fireblood (Frostblood Saga #2)
by Elly Blake
Purchase on: Amazon, iBooks
Add to: Goodreads

Synopsis:
All hail the Fire Queen.

Against all odds, Ruby has defeated the villainous Frost King and melted his throne of ice. But the bloodthirsty Minax that was trapped inside is now haunting her kingdom and everyone she loves. The answers to its demise may lie to the south in Sudesia, the land of the Firebloods, and a country that holds the secrets to Ruby’s powers and past…

Despite warnings from her beloved Arcus, Ruby accompanies a roguish Fireblood named Kai to Sudesia, where she must master her control of fire in a series of trials to gain the trust of the suspicious Fire Queen. Only then can she hope to access the knowledge that could defeat the rampaging Minax—which grows closer every moment. But as sparks fly in her moments alone with Kai, Ruby no longer knows whom to trust. The fates of two kingdoms are now in her hands.

He nodded, lips twisting in a slight grimace. “It frustrates Lord Ustathius to no end to find me here instead of in the council chambers. I told him this helps me think.”
“And does it?”
“Yes. It helps me think of you.”

It’s never my intention to belittle a book series on the second book (which I genuinely generally hate), or any of the books, really, if I love it with my whole heart. But, no, this was not a satisfying novel, no matter how much I wish it was so. I can’t love a book solely for the male lead, much as I want to, sometimes.

His lips twitched, the scar pulling taut in that way I found endlessly endearing. “And then there’s the matter of me having to duel with anyone who dared to stare at you. Which would be every man here.”
“They’d only stare because they’re afraid of me. They’re all waiting for me to melt something.”
“Ah, but, Lady Ruby, you already have,” he said, letting go of my waist to spin me in a quick circle. As I came back around, his hand returned to steady me. “You’ve melted my icy heart.”

I loved Arcus. I STILL love Arcus-even after Ruby’s typical heroine bullshit (yes, I cursed, which I have been trying not to do in my reviews anymore) where she feels the need to go against all reason, trust a complete stranger-a BOY stranger-and betray Arcus, in a manner. And yet, he still was an upstanding hero. He supports her-to an extent-because he loves her. And they still have their issues-their differences in powers and class-their worlds are different…yet he trusts her and would do anything for her, even when his whole court objects. To this, I say bravo, and I love him as a hero for it. Because, in the end, he let her do her thing, and that’s a beautiful sentiment.

“Home.” I sat trembling in the chair, his words and tone affecting me more than I wanted, making me want to curl up and weep in his arms. “I don’t even know where that is.“
“You’re my home,” Arcus said softly.

He was jealous, but not in a manner that held Ruby back from her dream. He was possessive, but only when he knew she wanted him-and only him-and he wanted the other male(s) to know it. And, finally, he would follow her anywhere. I just adore him….and I hope the final book does him justice, even as I found myself skimming this whole book because, alas, he was hardly in it (HOORAY FOR THAT SECOND BOOK PREDICTABILITY). Now, onto the copy of Nightblood I won in an Instagram giveaway-I am so excited! 😀

***************

Eh. I knew this one wasn’t going to be a win because of the second book tropes: Distance from Hero, extra random hero, boring self-discovery blah blah. But she hurt Arcus-which is unforgivable. So, there it is.

Plus, my goodness. I am reading faster than I can review-I’m only, oh, SIX reviews behind?!

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BOOK REVIEW: The Bear and the Nightingale (Winternight #1) by Katherine Arden

February 1, 2019 / Chelsea / 7 Comments

The Bear and the Nightingale (Winternight #1)
by Katherine Arden
Purchase on: Amazon, iBooks
Add to: Goodreads

Synopsis:
At the edge of the Russian wilderness, winter lasts most of the year and the snowdrifts grow taller than houses. But Vasilisa doesn't mind—she spends the winter nights huddled around the embers of a fire with her beloved siblings, listening to her nurse's fairy tales. Above all, she loves the chilling story of Frost, the blue-eyed winter demon, who appears in the frigid night to claim unwary souls. Wise Russians fear him, her nurse says, and honor the spirits of house and yard and forest that protect their homes from evil.

After Vasilisa's mother dies, her father goes to Moscow and brings home a new wife. Fiercely devout, city-bred, Vasilisa's new stepmother forbids her family from honoring the household spirits. The family acquiesces, but Vasilisa is frightened, sensing that more hinges upon their rituals than anyone knows.

And indeed, crops begin to fail, evil creatures of the forest creep nearer, and misfortune stalks the village. All the while, Vasilisa's stepmother grows ever harsher in her determination to groom her rebellious stepdaughter for either marriage or confinement in a convent.

As danger circles, Vasilisa must defy even the people she loves and call on dangerous gifts she has long concealed—this, in order to protect her family from a threat that seems to have stepped from her nurse's most frightening tales.

“Before the end, you will pluck snowdrops at midwinter, die by your own choosing, and weep for a nightingale.”

I think it’s fairly safe to say that I trust my older friends and those that know me well to guide me in this world of one billion books, but that doesn’t mean everything always fits. Example: This book. I have seen so many reviewers say how strongly they love this and I have remained interested since I first saw this hauntingly beautiful cover. I started it months ago, loved the first few lines, but knew it was a book better suited for a totally different mood.

“I had to,” Vasya rejoined. Blackness darted suddenly before her eyes. Her brief flare of strength was fading fast. “They were going to send me to a convent. I decided I would rather freeze in a snowbank.” Her skin shivered all over. “Well, that was before I began to freeze in a snowbank. It hurts.”
“Yes,” said Morozko. “Yes, it does.”

Fast forward to this week and I just got a feeling this was THE book I needed right now. I am still in my Diviners funk, or at least I was when I started this novel, and needed something to snap me right out of it. Snap it did, for I have been able to move on! I just wish I’d have loved this one more.

Vasya rose in silence, letting her blanket fall. The cold air sank fangs into her flesh. She crept to the stable door. There was no moon, and fat clouds smothered the stars. The snow was still falling.

It had all the makings of books I adore: Beautiful story-telling, amazing prose, and an anti-hero (or is he a hero? I don’t know) that was wonderful to love. I fell so hard for the beginning-how beautiful. Really. I will likely never forget that first line that struck a chord with me, both when I started it months ago and this week when I read it. Sometimes a book just fits your mood.

“If God gives me strength, I will save you.”
“I am only a country girl,” said Vasya. She reached again into the blackberry bush, wary of thorns. “I have never seen Tsargrad, or angels, or heard the voice of God. But I think you should be careful, Batyushka, that God does not speak in the voice of your own wishing. We have never needed saving before.”

But then a certain character, or TWO, brought religion into the mix-heavily-and it strongly disjointed the bridge between the fantastic beginning I so loved and adored, and the end that somewhat redeemed the novel for me. But, frankly, nothing can erase the horrors we had to go though to get to what I longed for in the story. I don’t like animal massacre, I don’t like children dying, I don’t like putting myself in the place of the mothers wailing and begging, and I don’t like righteous religion sprinkled throughout, even if our main characters aren’t a part of it.

It was just too much, for me, and I didn’t want to deal with it. And to have to wait for the Frost Demon to make a large appearance until the end? It was all just too much-it’s as simple as that. Call me transparent. Call me shallow. Call me what you will-it doesn’t make me love this book…nor will it keep me from reading the second.

That may seem silly to some-if there wasn’t enough to love about the first to move on, then why move on? Well, that’s just it-There was enough…just enough. Like that beginning. Like the gorgeous atmosphere that painted a picture before my eyes and made me long to be there, breathing in the crisp snow and bundling up by the fire. It wasn’t all bad. There’s more than even The Frost Demon. I liked this author’s story-telling. Why else would I have finished, even when I felt bad most of the time?

So, would I say this was a slam-dunk? A home-run? It didn’t knock it out of the park, but I have it on good authority that there’s more to the story and I need to stick it out-that I’ll even want the hardbacks, in the end. So I forge on, just hoping that I don’t have to be miserable to get through this next story.

OH! And I think it’s worth mentioning that this book is actually kind of scary, at times. Atmospheric, yes, but creepy-like I was there. I didn’t expect that, because no one told me nor did I ever see it in a review. I think it’s worth saying, because there are a lot of people like me who don’t know that before going in. And I understand Russian folklore is darker…but I suppose I didn’t know just how dark. Just a warning.

********

Yeahhhhhhh…. this face about sums up the summary of my reading experience. My feelings about this book are vast-for I LOVED the beginning, hated the middle, and I have no clue what to say about the end other than we finally got more Frost Demon (yes please) and I love him to pieces.

Child deaths. Mothers wailing and frantically grasping for their children not to be taken away and buried. Mutilated animals. Anddddd apparently it’s creepy as well??? Dead bodies coming to life and scratching on the door? Sharp teeth, black eyes, and dripping black blood from the mouth? WTF.

SO. To sum up: Chelsea hated the trigger-happiness of this novel. Chelsea did not like the turn of events from atmospheric, wonderful, and intriguing to dark, deadly, and religious. Chelsea loved the Frost Demon. Chelsea heard TFD is well worth it if you continue on and this plague of a book leads into something far greater. Chelsea will read book two. For The Frost Demon, that is.

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BOOK REVIEW: Outlander (Outlander #1) by Diana Gabaldon

January 25, 2019 / Chelsea / 6 Comments

Outlander (Outlander #1)
by Diana Gabaldon
Purchase on: Amazon, iBooks
Add to: Goodreads

Synopsis:
The year is 1945. Claire Randall, a former combat nurse, is just back from the war and reunited with her husband on a second honeymoon when she walks through a standing stone in one of the ancient circles that dot the British Isles. Suddenly she is a Sassenach—an “outlander”—in a Scotland torn by war and raiding border clans in the year of Our Lord...1743.

Hurled back in time by forces she cannot understand, Claire is catapulted into the intrigues of lairds and spies that may threaten her life, and shatter her heart. For here James Fraser, a gallant young Scots warrior, shows her a love so absolute that Claire becomes a woman torn between fidelity and desire—and between two vastly different men in two irreconcilable lives.

For where all love is, the speaking is unnecessary. It is all. It is undying. And it is enough.

I have many other reviews that I was supposed to post before this one but, frankly, I don’t care. When a book sweeps you off your feet, you take that passion and make into a review because you damn well feel like it. When I picked this up, I had no clue if I’d enjoy it or not-in fact, I have a long-winded story that goes along with this series, and I don’t want to bore you with the details but, well, that’s kind of what I do. So…

…knowing, as so many other edible creatures have found, that there is protection in numbers. And that knowledge, bred in the bone, is what lies behind mob rule. Because to step outside the group, let alone to stand against it, was for uncounted thousands of years death to the creature who dared it. To stand against a crowd would take something more than ordinary courage; something that went beyond human instinct. And I feared I did not have it, and fearing, was ashamed.

I have a weird-um-thing with accents. I don’t really enjoy reading them in stories, especially heavy accents, so this series just never has appealed to me. English? Okay, I can deal with a British tone if the writing is good alongside the Brit speak. But Scottish? I don’t know-this is hard for me. It’s probably the ONE accent I swore I’d never read. Back in 2014/2015 when my lovely buddy was big into these, I told her I was ABSOLUTELY UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES EVER GOING TO PICK UP THESE BOOKS. Then the show came out. But still-I was not moved (even if that guy they cast is hella good looking and I was partially tempted). And, plus, this was such a long time ago. I did NOT read very big fantasies, at the time, and it seemed like a really big deal to me to undertake such a behemoth of a book. I did like fantasy-I loved it! But it wasn’t my main focus and it all seemed so daunting to jump into the larger fantasies.

The sun was setting. The last rays of light shone through a blue glass flagon that stood on the table, streaking the wall with a shaft of brilliant lapis. I felt as fragile and as brilliant as the glass, as though I would shatter with a touch, and fall in glittering fragments to the floor. If I had meant to spare either Jamie’s emotions or my own, it seemed I was very much too late.

Fast forward to 2018, a couple months ago, and I see a picture of Mr. Jamie on GR (Yeah, good marketing, bravo, really) and a quote underneath it (in his heavy Scottish tone, no less) and something happened that day-my heart stirred and my breath quickened or shallowed or whatever you want to say-I got the feels, okay?

That man and those bookish quote feels happened and I knew it was time. I’m a big girl now. All I really read is fantasy, I’m hard to please (urmm kind of?), and, frankly, BBFs are few and far between (bahaha okay, no, not really but whatever) and I just-I’m always on the search for a book or series these days that will take my breath away and completely consume my soul-it’s been a tough road, this year, for series. All I could deal with were standalones, it seemed, because series were so underwhelming to me. But then came August-now. And will you look at that? I HAVE BEEN A SERIES BINGING FOOL. It turns out that fantasy/historical fiction is my JAM. The diviners + Outlander. WTF? Will wonders never cease?

That’s right. The girl who is against all things historical (mostly) and accents read two of the most daunting type books ever and they kicked my teeth in with the feels. Which, this just goes to show you that my feelings have been right all along on this matter: You read what you feel. I would NEVER have liked the Diviners three years ago-maybe not even a year ago. Outlander would have bored me to death. Maybe it’s because I had a little girl. Maybe it’s because I’ve been faced with appreciating the finer things in life. Whatever the reason, I have found a Genre that steals my heart almost every time I pick it up-and that genre is fantasy.

“Now, then. What does ‘fucking’ mean?”
My surprise must have shown plainly, for he said irritably, “If ye must call me names, that’s one thing. But I dinna care to be called things I can’t answer. I know it’s a damn filthy word, from the way ye said it, but what does it mean?”

Anyway. My point is, this book is just absolutely wonderful-but it’s not going to be for everybody. For me, I found humor in the smallest places, the silliest moments, like when they’d fight, or Claire’s voice. I’d be angry at the most pivotal moments-There were just, ugh, so many triggers. There really were….yet I just loved this story so much. Then there was Jamie and, well, where do I even START??

“I can bear pain, myself,” he said softly, “but I couldna bear yours. That would take more strength than I have.”

Jamie is, was, and will always be the heart of this book. He is kind, thoughtful, and without a doubt one of the most selfless heroes I’ve ever met. Really. The things he did, the things he sacrificed, the way he loved Claire so deeply and wholly, the way he trusted her so faithfully and supported her wholeheartedly…It’s unparalleled. And she was willing to leave him in the blink of an eye, for a while. I just-I can’t. He is the epitome of a book boyfriend and I cannot fathom never meeting him-shame on me. But I am so glad I chose a time when I was mature enough to fully cherish him, because he is worth the wait.

I mean, I’ve held women in my arms before, and kissed them, and … well.
…
He reached out and touched my lower lip, barely brushing the edge. “It starts out the same, but then, after a moment,” he said, speaking softly, “suddenly it’s as though I’ve a living flame in my arms.” His touch grew firmer, outlining my lips and caressing the line of my jaw. “And I want only to throw myself into it and be consumed.”

And I don’t say this lightly-yes, I love my book boyfriends, but-Jamie is on another level. The dedication and bravery and loyalty and willingness to save Claire at all costs-and I DO mean ALL costs-literally. It’s spell-binding. And I don’t think my heart was even close to ready for it.

Getting up once in the dark to go adventuring is a lark. Twice in two days smacks of masochism.

Babies and animals and pregnancy and probably more things than I can possibly remember, this book gutted me with the issues it brought forth. And, for other people (didn’t bother me at all, but I’m a different sort)-View Spoiler ». Those are the things to watch out for, FYI.

There is a fine line sometimes, between justice and brutality.

And thus concludes my book review that always somehow turns into a book in and of itself. If it weren’t for the fact that these books are so. Dang. LONG. I would already be halfway through book 2 by now. But, alas, I’m just not able to skip out on other books I was excited to read about before the year’s end, but I’m ecstatic to start the next book-and the tv show-in 2019! I know I’m getting some Outlander goodies for Christmas, and I just can hardly contain myself-this book got me through my surgery, and it got me out of it. I love it and it will always hold a very special place in my heart.

*****

If I’m being honest, I finished this book more than a week ago-but, unfortunately, I was on the mend after emergency surgery to get my appendix removed sooooo that’s why I haven’t been able to post anything for a while. But, in one gif, this is how this series, this book, and my darling Jamie made me feel:

RTC.

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BOOK REVIEW: Sorcery of Thorns by Margaret Rogerson

January 18, 2019 / Chelsea / 8 Comments

Sorcery of Thorns by Margaret Rogerson
Purchase on: Amazon, iBooks
Add to: Goodreads

Synopsis:
From the New York Times bestselling author of An Enchantment of Ravens comes an imaginative fantasy about an apprentice at a magical library who must battle a powerful sorcerer to save her kingdom.

All sorcerers are evil. Elisabeth has known that as long as she has known anything. Raised as a foundling in one of Austermeer’s Great Libraries, Elisabeth has grown up among the tools of sorcery—magical grimoires that whisper on shelves and rattle beneath iron chains. If provoked, they transform into grotesque monsters of ink and leather. She hopes to become a warden, charged with protecting the kingdom from their power.

Then an act of sabotage releases the library’s most dangerous grimoire. Elisabeth’s desperate intervention implicates her in the crime, and she is torn from her home to face justice in the capital. With no one to turn to but her sworn enemy, the sorcerer Nathaniel Thorn, and his mysterious demonic servant, she finds herself entangled in a centuries-old conspiracy. Not only could the Great Libraries go up in flames, but the world along with them.

As her alliance with Nathaniel grows stronger, Elisabeth starts to question everything she’s been taught—about sorcerers, about the libraries she loves, even about herself. For Elisabeth has a power she has never guessed, and a future she could never have imagined.

**ARC provided by Publisher-I have SO MANY QUOTES I WANT TO SHARE-but I love getting ARCs more. SO hopefully I’ll have the time to come back and add quotes in the future when it releases! 😊 **

You have no idea-no idea-what it means to me to have received this ARC. An Enchantment of Ravens was my favorite book of 2017 after Rook stole my heart completely and Isobel fought her way through my crusty exterior, as well. It would belittle my love for this author to say her writing and stories are anything less than extraordinary as she has proved not once, but twice, that she is an amazingly fierce story-teller. No, it wasn’t just a fluke, her first book-It’s clear she has much to say and will continue to do so with her hauntingly beautiful YA fantasies.

I’ll admit that the first bit of this book scared me a little because it didn’t start out in a way that appealed to me as quickly as her first work did…but those apprehensive thoughts were quickly shattered when the first grimoire burst onto the scene and put our MC into an absolutely irredeemable situation. And perhaps the most charming thing about this book is the vulnerability and innocence of our main character-bound by duty, but without the slightest clue as to what she was up against-and the unbending will she has to remain loyal, even as everything is spiraling into madness around her.

She knows what she saw, but what she doesn’t know is who to trust. She has a deadly secret, one that may get her killed, or worse, forgotten-sent to an insane asylum where no one ever remembers the inhabitants that reside there. But there is someone who seems to at least care about her well-being a teensy bit, for the most part, and that’s the sorcerer (sorcerers-with which she grew up being told not to trust) who she met when he visited the library before an unlikely chain of events made her the most wanted girl by the most powerful man.

And this is where I just…fell in love. Yes, the danger-of course-but the bond between Silas and Nathaniel, and then with Nathaniel and Elisabeth. And, even, Silas with Elisabeth. I think, in some part, Silas is what makes this book possible. You’ll see what I mean if you read, naturally, but it shows from the beginning just how powerful his bond is with Nathaniel, what he’d do to make him happy, how he helps unflinchingly when most other demon servants don’t care one way or another what happens to their masters. And I understand that this sounds like dribble if you haven’t read the book, but just know that Nathaniel trusts Silas while no one else trusts the demons in their household…because Silas cared for him when there was no one else.

It might come as shocking, as well, that Nathaniel is actually a supremely tortured hero-during the day he’s witty, funny, snarky, protective, and he keeps Eliasabeth at arm’s length, though we have no clue why. Being naïve, she REALLY has no idea-we as readers know he’s just trying to protect her. But, besides the imminent danger she’s in, from what is he protecting her from? And this is a layer in the story that truly seized my soul, because we all know I love a hero who hides scars beneath, who has a story we don’t know or understand that makes them feel inadequate or dangerous. I love these story-lines, and adding Silas’s snark on the matter only adds more heart to the story.

And, naturally, this is a wonderfully addictive slow-burn romance, though it never once took the spotlight in the story. The author warned that, while AEOR was a Fairy-Tale Fantasy, this would only be a YA fantasy, with a-wait for it-smidgen of romance.

Yes…just. Yes. And, even with all of that warning, I still felt like the romance soared onto the pages like a raging inferno…and straight into my heart. That’s TWICE this author has written a romance that knocked me on my feels out of nowhere, and, it’s a gift, really, a talent. I love romance, I really do, but I truly only fall for the fantasies that have a spattering of it in the story, hidden behind a compelling plot and dangerous, high-stakes moments. Which, obviously, that was the case here, so I need not look any further.

And, even more than that…this book made me sob, at the end. I really don’t cry often in books, even though I always seem like an emotional mess, it’s truly not the case. I rarely cry. But, for some reason (just GUESS, UGH, Shoot me in my HEART already), the end hit me harder than I thought possible. The friendship between these three, the loyalty, the unrequited love (so they think) between Nathaniel and Elisabeth, the vulnerability, the humor, and the sense of a girl (and, really, a boy) never quite being able to find a home or a place they feel like they belong, misfits of a sort, until they found each other-it all just built up into a crashing crescendo of feels and the end finally knocked me out. I was depleted. I was hopeful. My soul was pieced together then ripped apart violently…and then there was hope. Again.

I can’t even begin to explain all the feelings I experienced while reading this coveted ARC, but I can try. And I hope that this review shed a positive light on how wonderful this book made me feel after becoming depleted and depressed after a totally random appendix ER situation (which, in turn, is why this review is JUST NOW being written) where I wasn’t able to do anything I normally do, rendering me lazy, without exercise, and somewhat helpless and at other’s will…so, yes. This book was a saving grace, and I will abso-lutely be pre-ordering the hardback so it can sit next to my other favorite, featuring a stubborn fae and another fierce and inspiring heroine. I just cannot wait until I can read it again. I hope you’ll read it, too.

*************************

My God did this book make me bawl like a baby-I was an utter mess. That hasn’t happened in FOREVER!

RTC.

***

MY LIFE IS MADE. I will be starting this, oh, immediately!!!! Who needs an appendix when you get early Christmas presents like these! *heart eyes emoji*

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BOOK REVIEW: The Wicked King (Folk of the Air #2) by Holly Black

January 16, 2019 / Chelsea / 7 Comments

The Wicked King (The Folk of the Air #2)
by Holly Black
Purchase on: Amazon, iBooks
Add to: Goodreads

Synopsis:
You must be strong enough to strike and strike and strike again without tiring.

The first lesson is to make yourself strong.

After the jaw-dropping revelation that Oak is the heir to Faerie, Jude must keep her younger brother safe. To do so, she has bound the wicked king, Cardan, to her, and made herself the power behind the throne. Navigating the constantly shifting political alliances of Faerie would be difficult enough if Cardan were easy to control. But he does everything in his power to humiliate and undermine her even as his fascination with her remains undiminished.

When it becomes all too clear that someone close to Jude means to betray her, threatening her own life and the lives of everyone she loves, Jude must uncover the traitor and fight her own complicated feelings for Cardan to maintain control as a mortal in a Faerie world.

I wonder if there’s a limit to what I will let them do, if there is something that would make me fight back, even if it dooms me.
If there is, that makes me a fool.
But maybe if there isn’t, that makes me a monster.

I guess that’s the thing about being in love with a series. You love the first, you anticipate the second, and then wonder what’s to come with the third-but you can’t ever really know if that author is going to do what you want. Do things that make sense to you while also coming off as exciting and better than you possibly could have anticipated. If that author will make you happy while also crushing your soul, like the best possible twist of the knife and manipulation of your heart. This never happens. Yes, I have MANY favorites. YES, lots of things happen that I like and that placate me. But rarely-VERY RARELY-does an author do every maniacal thing I could possibly imagine-and even take it farther than I could even fathom. And this is what Black did. She came. She wrote. She F****** conquered.

“Power,” he said. “Power is the ability to get what you want. Power is the ability to be the one making the decisions. And how do we get power?”
“We learn how to fight well?”
“We get power by taking it.”

I just…this NEVER HAPPENS. Yeah, there might be one little thing I wish wasn’t a part of the end. But, like, that is nothing in the way of how excellent, how thorough, how utterly magnificent she wrote this book. The scheming. The lies. The betrayals. The heat. The ROMANCE. There was not one thing that I love about a fantasy book that was not in this story. There really and truly wasn’t. In fact, this book taught me far more about myself than I’ve learned in a long time.

“It seems I have a singular taste for women who threaten me.”

If you recall, or care at all, I read Outlander and The Diviners (how could you forget?) last year and they were so far out of my comfort zone that I read them YEARS after I was told to. A big mistake, I’ll admit. And they consumed me-I’ll just say it. Especially the prior, making the month of October a big waste of a TBR because all I read was the three books available in that series. But Outlander did something to my being, too, that possessed me for quite some time around the holidays. To say I was possessed in body, mind, and soul a few times last year would be an understatement. I even found Mariana Zapata and was a big ‘ol mess when I read her books, too. Let’s just say that 2018 was interesting, to say the least.

“The three of you have one solution to every problem. Murder. No key fits every lock.” Cardan gives us all a stern look, holding up a long-fingered hand with my stolen ruby ring still on one finger. “Someone tries to betray the High King, murder. Someone gives you a harsh look, murder. Someone disrespects you, murder. Someone ruins your laundry, murder.

But then this. THIS masterpiece. The thing is, I’ll be frank, that I hate middle books. I LOATHE THEM. They never go right. Ever. And I actually have started to hate final books, too, because authors just don’t have what it takes to end things right, to wrap them up nicely, and, I’ll say it again, rarely do they meet the expectations I’ve upheld through the series and give me what I am craving, needing, wanting to put the series down wholly satisfied. And-I always try not to have any expectations, to not fangirl too much before a release, and to not expect much. Sadly, I still always fail. My entire being always wants more, whether I try to keep it chill or not, and I end up with a broken heart. Always.

He smelled like smoke and dried blood, and Jude let herself sag against him. It was good to be hugged. Even by a monster.

But here’s the thing, and my entire point: I didn’t, not once, doubt Holly Black or her writing before the release, so I anticipated and fangirled freely. I’ve read her White Cat series, and it was nothing short of all consuming, even if not many talk about it. I loved it. Cassel was my first thief and conman, and he lead me to Kaz from SOC. So, to say Holly Black can finish a series with a bang, wrap things up neatly and how I love and expect is, again, an understatement. I legitimately, for the first time in as long as I can remember, wasn’t the least bit worried that I would be bored, unhappy, or underwhelmed. I had that much confidence in this author. I had no worries at all. Well…except for what was to come. But that’s a different beast entirely.

“Power is much easier to acquire than it is to hold on to.”

What came with this story wasn’t a fairy tale romance, nor an underhanded, leisurely stroll in politics (following the first book’s end). No, it wasn’t action every minute…but there wasn’t a chapter that didn’t steal my breath away. This book was pulse-pounding, heart-stopping, butterfly inducing panic and mayhem, wrapped in sexual tension and explosive….erm….developments. It was underhanded, dirty, and altogether a total mind bender that never let you have your guard down, your mind not spinning, and your soul not entirely invested. It was a home run, triple play, and home base stealing ride-you could never take your eyes off the page for reality and day to day activities because you couldn’t ever possibly get enough.

“For a moment,” he says, “I wondered if it wasn’t you shooting bolts at me.”
I make a face at him. “And what made you decide it wasn’t?”
He grins up at me. “They missed.”

I read both too fast and too slow, a perfect symphony of chaos and calm, and I never wanted it to end-But I had to know what was coming next. Where it was going…and what predicament my darlings would inevitably get themselves into, in the end. And I couldn’t be happier with the absolutely soul-crushing finish.

My body has acclimated, and now it craves what it should revile.
An apt metaphor for other things.

And, before I can wrap this up, I have to embark on the journey that is Cardan and Jude. I can’t say much, and I promise I won’t (though it kills me slowly not to), but you must know that any feels that overcame you, possessed you, enraptured you in TCP…they are tenfold…and you just cannot be prepared. I don’t believe in overhyping-in fact, I discourage it. But here, I am confident that even if you don’t love this, you will feel something when it comes to the sexual tension between these two. I am THAT confident. And I would never do that to you, unless I believed it with my very being.

…and the single last thing in my head: that I like him better than I’ve ever liked anyone and that of all the things he’s ever done to me, making me like him so much is by far the worst.

The heat, the tension, the pure and utter HATE they have for one another…it’s so intoxicating. Sick. Depraved. Wrong. Yet you can’t not ship them. You can’t not love them. And, inevitably, you can’t not hope for them to just do it already. He loves her. I know it. And she loves him. I know that, too. THEY HAVE TO. I just….I can’t say anything. But, I will say this: I got everything I could ever want and more-without getting everything I want….and more.

It occurs to me that maybe desire isn’t something overindulging helps. Maybe it is not unlike mithridatism; maybe I took a killing dose when I should have been poisoning myself slowly, one kiss at a time.

So, to say I didn’t love this and that another book will pass by my love for it this year would be a lie-so I just won’t say it. What I will say is this: If you didn’t love the first, I don’t know that you will love the second. But maybe you will. It has even more lies. Deceit. Chaos. Heartbreak. Longing. If you dig that, this is for you. It has it all. And it doesn’t just come from the human in a faerie world. Just. F’in. Sayin’.

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I am angry editing my Instagram pictures right now. My nerves are shot, my stomach is a mass of nervous butterflies. When, only moments before, they were butterflies of hope and romance and so much more. So, I guess what I’m saying in a nutshell is: Holly Black got me. She got me fucking GOOD. I am not alright. I am not okay. And I just don’t know if I can pick up the pieces of my fractured heart off the floor for this one-And I don’t think I’ve ever said that. Well played, Black-You own my soul.

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OMG JUST GOT MY EXCLUSIVE OWLCRATE VERSION BOX EARLY SO GUESS WHO IS STARTING THIS OMG THIS IS THE FIRST OWLCRATE BOOK IVE TAKEN OUT OF THE PROTECTIVE PLASTIC TO READ OMGGGG I CANT EVEN

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