Category: Review (Page 215 of 296)

BOOK REVIEW: Dairy Queen (Dairy Queen #1) by Catherine Gilbert Murdock

October 1, 2015 / Chelsea / 0 Comments

Dairy Queen (Dairy Queen #1)
by Catherine Gilbert Murdock
Purchase on: Amazon, iBooks
Add to: Goodreads

Synopsis:
When you don’t talk, there’s a lot of stuff that ends up not getting said.
Harsh words indeed, from Brian Nelson of all people. But, D. J. can’t help admitting, maybe he’s right.

When you don’t talk, there’s a lot of stuff that ends up not getting said.
Stuff like why her best friend, Amber, isn’t so friendly anymore. Or why her little brother, Curtis, never opens his mouth. Why her mom has two jobs and a big secret. Why her college-football-star brothers won’t even call home. Why her dad would go ballistic if she tried out for the high school football team herself. And why Brian is so, so out of her league.

When you don’t talk, there’s a lot of stuff that ends up not getting said.
Welcome to the summer that fifteen-year-old D. J. Schwenk of Red Bend, Wisconsin, learns to talk, and ends up having an awful lot of stuff to say.

That’s one advantage to not talking. After a while people stop talking back.

I swear, I swear to you….I am not a snob. Really!! Swear!! But come on…look at this cover. It’s a cow. In a tiara. With a blue sky in the background and named after a restaurant I love. What’s a girl to think when she sees this? Oh well, guess it’s a moot point…

Because this book was fabulous. (okay, I was guna use that GIF anyway because duh, friends, but it just worked out so well 😉 )
Basically what it came down to was that my life sucked. It sucked even more than it had before Brian showed up, because now I knew it.

This book, while funny and outwardly mocking in and of itself, was also surprisingly deep, full of values that aren’t always put first in a teenager’s life. D.J.’s voice is one that, while a little different at first, is one that I think many young girls could relate to. Hell, I could relate to it.

Think about it-No, I’m not a farmer, and no, I wasn’t totally socially awkward ever, but I had trouble finding my voice. And not everyone runs into this problem, I know that. But, hey, I grew up in the country, and I went to a school where driving your tractor there wouldn’t raise eyebrows. It was Hick City people. The kids were very kind, very well brought up for a public school, so it should come as no shock to you that when my parents ripped me out of that happy (and horrible academically wise) school away from all my friends just as I was getting my braces and figuring out who I was (thanks mom and dad, really), I had trouble finding my place at the elite schools in town. I bet you’re asking why they pulled me out. I’ll tell you why in a few words: Soccer program (as in, ours was nonexistent and I was REALLY GOOD) and academics. I couldn’t go into high school without a better level of academics and not knowing the in town program and it’s people and coaches. ANYWAY.
I hate it when people make fun of me and it turns out they’re right.

So, when I started in town at a tiny private school with a totally different grading scale and girls that were far more advanced than I in 7th grade, I found that I was standing on the outside of the circle with very little to say besides a literal smile and nod of the head for everything they deemed important. Ah, youth. I want to incinerate some of those moments. But that’s my whole point-I knew what I wanted to say, and I rarely agreed with what they were going on and on about. I had my own opinions, but I was both too shy and too backwards (at the time) to express them…so I just looked wild-eyed at them and nodded my head so as to fit in. Yeah. That worked out great. But, again, the point-I am just like D.J. in this instance…and I think many young girls are, as well.
How could a guy who was such a jerk, how could he act so nice?

And that’s why I loved this cute little story so much. Yeah, the writing was great and the boy was great (Brian!!!!) and it was so so funny…but I fell for D.J.. She’s this girl who thinks so little of herself, yet she’s so very strong and smart and determined. She has trouble expressing herself, even though she has so much to say. And I loved that. I loved her voice and her thoughtful sentences and the way she spoke to you as if you were a friend. It was a journey of discovering herself and finding out that not everybody is what you’d imagine them to be. And…most importantly, this chick tries out for football. And then she falls for the rival team’s quarterback. Be still my star-crossed heart.
I couldn’t help wondering if maybe it had something to do with me, like our water fight and all. But then I realized that I was totally stupid and there’s no way it could ever be about me, not in a million years, not if I was the only girl on the entire planet.

Now, I know what you’re thinking: What a weird concept. I know, I thought so too. But when she decides to try out for football, it actually became my favorite part…because, you know, she has to play that rival football team MUAHA! lol. I’m weird today. Anyway! She decides to train Brian all summer after some prompting from a family friend because she trained with her brothers who are now big names in college football. What starts out as reluctant training and working together on the farm becomes a highlight of each of their weeks, and something so much more.

The whole book D.J. is trying to prove her worth to herself, that she’s not just some cow that does what everybody says, and when she finally finds a purpose, playing football for her school’s team, it helps her to feel vindicated and strong and worthy of people’s admiration. I think that’s where my admiration came in for her…what a brave (and hilarious) thing to do.

I saw something I wanted to do and I decided to do it. The feeling of freedom this gave me-I can’t even describe it. It was my decision. I chose it. I am not a cow.

So, you know, despite my earlier trepidation of how this story would be, I got just as many feels from this as any other book: Angst, fear, butterflies, sadness, giddiness, family issues, this book had it all. Near the end my stomach was in such a big bundle of nerves I almost couldn’t sleep. And I guess that’s my other life lesson…you can’t judge a book by it’s cover. Sometimes you find the best stories with the worst covers…it just happens. But I’m sure I’ll continue to make that mistake…but I’ll do my best to shake the habit.

************************

Surprisingly deep with wonderful values…I can’t wait to read more of this series.

And, you know…

Just sayin’

RTC

BOOK REVIEW: Emmy & Oliver by Robin Benway

September 30, 2015 / Chelsea / 1 Comment

Emmy & Oliver by Robin Benway
Purchase on: Amazon
Add to: Goodreads

Synopsis:
Emmy’s best friend, Oliver, reappears after being kidnapped by his father ten years ago. Emmy hopes to pick up their relationship right where it left off. Are they destined to be together? Or has fate irreparably driven them apart?

Emmy just wants to be in charge of her own life.

She wants to stay out late, surf her favorite beach—go anywhere without her parents’ relentless worrying. But Emmy’s parents can’t seem to let her grow up—not since the day Oliver disappeared.

Oliver needs a moment to figure out his heart.

He’d thought, all these years, that his dad was the good guy. He never knew that it was his father who kidnapped him and kept him on the run. Discovering it, and finding himself returned to his old hometown, all at once, has his heart racing and his thoughts swirling.

Emmy and Oliver were going to be best friends forever, or maybe even more, before their futures were ripped apart. In Emmy’s soul, despite the space and time between them, their connection has never been severed. But is their story still written in the stars? Or are their hearts like the pieces of two different puzzles—impossible to fit together?

Readers who love Sarah Dessen will tear through these pages with hearts in throats as Emmy and Oliver struggle to face the messy, confusing consequences of Oliver’s father’s crime. Full of romance, coming-of-age emotion, and heartache, these two equally compelling characters create an unforgettable story.

I guess the more you start to love someone, the more you ache when they’re gone, and maybe it’s that middle ground that hurts the most, when you can see them and still not feel like you’re near enough. So close and yet so far.

Absolutely too cute for words. Deep, heartfelt, unforgettable.

Sometimes I could slap myself for being so shortsighted. And, just to warn you, I’ll probably even say that on tomorrow’s review….I just have this mental block that prevents me from taking a risk, taking chances that might help me find some of the best stories ever-and this is one I almost missed out on.

It’s pretty clear I poach all my ideas off Anna (well, 90% of them) and generally come out on top. I can tout and say it’s because I’m picky…well, hey, I really am…but a lot of my choices wouldn’t even exist without Anna saying, hey, check this one out. So, you know, this is my way of saying that, while I say I’m creative…I’m really not. And this book?? It was absolute perfection.
Sometimes there just aren’t enough words to fill the crack in your heart.

When I read the blurb for this, ~~I passed it up multiple times~~ I guess I didn’t realize just how…difficult??…a story like this could be. It seemed simple enough-Boy gets taken by his father. Mother is devastated. Emmy and her friends are scarred for life, always waiting for him to return. Boy returns when he’s 17. Emmy and Oliver fall in love. Simple…right? Wrong.
Oliver looked up at me, his face solemn and pained, and I realized with a terrible rush we weren’t playing anymore. “Colleen,” he said, “coming home feels like being kidnapped all over again.”

If you were a kid and everything you knew was flipped around, your world titled on its axis, how would you react? Well, we don’t technically know. He was gone, stolen away from all those he cherished and loved. One can assume that he was confused and missed his mother and friends, only to eventually fall into a rhythm with his dad and delve into to his new life. So…I guess this leaves you wondering-If you were stripped of your life, everything you knew-not just once, but twice-how would you fare?

And then Oliver blinked again and it was like a shutter went off in his own eyes so I could see the picture of the anger, the hurt, the embarrassment. It was a private viewing just for me, gone a second later when he blinked once more and his face smoothed back into its normal, passive shape.

And I think that’s the largest issue in this book-Finding your place, struggling to wrap your head around new people, leaving all you know behind..it’s actually so sad when you think about it. And I think that’s why I was so shocked-and yes, I was very shocked by the depth of this book. Even from page one, which hooked me instantly by the way, it seemed light and funny and sweet. And, even with the darkness that creeped into the story sometimes, there was no lack of heartfelt moments and hilarious banter. And hey! There was some cheese, I’ll admit it. Wonderful, yummy, happy velveeta cheese-But only the best kind of cheese.
“Those look painful,” Oliver commented, trying to avoid Caro digging her heel into his shoulder. “Why does everything you do look like it hurts?”
“Because!” Caro huffed with a final shove. “You guys want us to look natural and there’s nothing natural about looking natural.”
I could see the confusion cross Oliver’s face and stifled my own smile.
“Those shoes don’t look natural,” Oliver pointed out.
“Yes, but they’re three-inch heels, which make me look like I’m an average height of five five. See?” She explained. “Natural.”

Okay!! My favorite part-The relationship. Emmy was devastated by the disappearance of Oliver. She might have even taken it harder than most even realized. They were partners in crime, best friends…in like with one another. You know how kids are 😛 . So when he comes back with more height, a different head of hair, a new look to him, and a dark cloud hanging over his head…she realizes he’s not the little boy that left all those years ago.

“Oh, riiiiight,” I said, knocking myself in the head and grinning like an idiot. “I’m sorry, I totally forgot.”
“That’s okay,” he replied. “Just adds to my rebel image. New guy in school, mysterious past, being held back a grade.” He smiled at me. “Girls like it.”
“Really?”
“Oh yeah.” He smiled wider. “That’s why I’m eating lunch with all these people.”
I laughed despite myself and then he laughed, too, a familiar sound that I hadn’t heard in years. His laugh was deeper now, but still Oliver’s, as unique as a double helix. Or a fingerprint.

Emmy starts to reach out to him, this kid who made national news and is now a social outcast because of it. Alone more often than not, he’s feeling angry, dejected, depressed that he is being thrown back into a life everyone remembers but him-all his old friends, the inside jokes, the memories they shared. But as Emmy begins to integrate him into her life, and her two best friends’ lives (they used to be a foursome), he starts to smile, laugh, joke, live…and he’s beginning to ache for the ten years they all lost.
“Quick question,” Oliver said as he scanned the horizon. “What is the shark population like around here?”
I blinked at him. “Are you being serious right now?”
“I don’t know.” He laughed nervously. “No. Yes. Maybe? Sharks?”
I sighed. “There are no sharks here.”
“Do you mean ‘here’ as in the ‘Pacific Ocean’ or…?”

I loved this cast of characters. They were so funny and realistic and you never felt like the conversations were fake or forced for the sake of being ‘hip’. This author made an authentic story with real conversations and real situations. I never once rolled my eyes or thought it was trying too hard. The friendships, the drama, the fights…they were so palpable I wanted to reach out and swirl my hand in their tangible depths. And, even more than that, I wanted to hug my poor little Oliver, who always felt lost and alone.
Tortured, lost, devastated, Oliver has never felt more alone. As he and Emmy become closer, we begin to see his playful side, his happy side-but he never quite knows what to do. His mom searched for him for years, and now she has him…in her new life. He doesn’t know where he fits and feels like he’s disrupting her-and everyone else’s-life. We see the emotional turmoil he goes through trying to find his place…and trying to sort through his lingering emotions of missing his dad, even when he knows he did something horribly wrong.
That’s when I first learned about true frustration, that wrenching ache when the thing that matters most to you barely makes a ripple in other people’s lives.

This story is one that took me completely by surprise. It’s not because I didn’t think it would be good-from page one you could tell it would be fabulous-but I didn’t realize just how many emotions I-or they-would feel. I started this book during a terrible week. And even at the worst of times, I’d pick this up and would immediately get butterflies, smile like a loon, and start laughing in the quiet of night-disturbing hubbs repeatedly. This book is wonderful, one to truly cherish and never forget. WHEN I get the hardback, I’m going to hug it close…and be all creepy and snuggle with it. Whoops. I only hope that others will give this fantastic book a chance. I swear it will make you feel as light as air.

*Note: I have to say something I missed on the review: Oliver was always supportive for Emmy…no matter what. And he never got mad at her. He was so adorable and supportive. Anyway. Forgot that. Whoops again.

BOOK REVIEW – Forever with You (Wait for You #5) by Jennifer L. Armentrout

September 28, 2015 / Jen / 0 Comments

Forever with You (Wait for You #5)
by J. Lynn, Jennifer L. Armentrout
Purchase on: Amazon, iBooks
Add to: Goodreads

Synopsis:
Some things you just believe in, even if you've never experienced them. For Stephanie, that list includes love. It's out there. Somewhere. Eventually. Meanwhile she's got her job at the mixed martial arts training center and hot flings with gorgeous, temporary guys like Nick. Then a secret brings them closer, opening Steph's eyes to a future she never knew she wanted—until tragedy rips it away.

Nick's self-assured surface shields a past no one needs to know about. His mind-blowing connection with Steph changes all that. As fast as he's knocking down the walls that have kept him commitment-free, she's building them up again, determined to keep the hurt—and Nick—out. But he can't walk away. Not when she's the only one who's ever made him wish for forever . . .

Review:

Forever With You was a story that was passionate, sultry, captivating and insanely seductive. It was perfection in my eyes. The charm and banter that filled the pages pushed this story to a new level of sexy that I desperately search for each time I open a book. But you want to know the best part? When I reached that final page, I was left feeling giddy and smiley despite the fact that I cried, a lot. I’m still on a book high and Forever With You has officially become my favorite book in the Wait For You series!

Stephanie is the girl who had a physical relationship with the male characters from the first two books, Cam in Wait for You and Jase in Be with Me. She had attended college with that group of friends, but she wasn’t close to any of them. Since graduating from college, she got a new job and an apartment on all on her own. From the first moment that Stephanie met Nick, sparks fly. Their chemistry was raw, sexual and insanely hot! It had me anticipating when they were going to hook up and the emotional roller coaster ride that was ensured afterwards!

More than once I’d been accused of being standoffish and bitchy.
The truth was, it wasn’t that I was mean or unfriendly. I just generally sucked at small talk with people I didn’t know, and most important, I had a severe case of resting bitch face.

I. Loved. Stephanie! She was confident (at times), wasn’t afraid to defend herself, and underneath it all she was genuine and sweet. But in all honesty, I didn’t know what to think of her going into this book. She seemed nice enough, but I kept picturing that scene where poor Teresa walks into Jase’s room and Stephanie is standing there without her shirt on. Teresa and Jase weren’t together and Stephanie didn’t do anything wrong, but I felt horrible for Teresa. So starting this book, Stephanie was truly an unknown since I never once had a good grasp on her. But by page 2, I knew that she was astounding! Her swearing skills were impressive and I loved the way she interacted with Nick! Smiles were ensured and I found myself easily feeling every single emotion that she felt. And that made for an amazing experience!

“…..the fact that you think I came here looking for just you insinuates that I’m desperate. The fact that you think you can get with me after speaking to me the way you did tells me you don’t think very highly of me. And after one night with me you think you can dictate to me where I can go and what I cannot do? You must think I’m stupid.”
His brows flew up. “Steph-”
“Don’t.” I lifted a hand, stopping him. My middle finger might have been extended as I stepped around him and snatched my purse. “This conversation ends with a – how about you go fuck yourself.”

Nick was charismatic, charming, dark, sultry, sexy, and had a tortured past. Sigh. He could also go from being thoughtful and caring to the biggest ass on the face of the planet. Nick was everything that I always want to lust after in a book boyfriend. He was the type of man whose actions and words could be the polar opposite. One moment he was doing something that made you want to sigh out loud and grab him by the shirt and kiss him and then in the next moment his words could be like a slap across the face. He was a fun puzzle to figure out and I enjoyed every single moment trying to learn who Nick was. And I know that Nick is a character that is going to stick with me for a very long time because he had that profound of an impact on me. There was so much depth to him. And when we got to see every single part of him, the good and the bad, it was impossible not to love the whole package. He truly was a beautiful person, jackass and all!

His hand lingered in the space between us and then he cupped my cheek. The move startled me as he dragged his thumb under my lip. “It’s really a shame.”
I frowned. “What is?”
“Us,” he said, his voice low as his thumb made another sweep, and my breath caught. “That you and I are the way we are. It’s a damn shame.”

So YES I loved this book! It was truly stunning! I just wanted to run around my house jumping and laughing because this book was so much of everything I always want. Give me a heroine who I will love, give me a tortured man who will steal my breath away, give me fiery chemistry, give me a story that is all-consuming and I will fall in love with every single page. And that I did!

***ARC was kindly provided by the author, at the San Fran Golden Gate Event, in exchange for an honest review***

Reading Order & Links: Amazon (click on covers), iBooks (click on titles) & Book Depository (click on book #) *Each book can be read as a standalone, but best enjoyed in order.*
Wait for You #1 Reviews: Chelsea	Trust in Me #1.5 Cam's POV-Wait for You Reviews: Jen	Be with Me #2 Reviews: Jen
Stay with Me #3 Reviews: Jen Chelsea	Fall with Me #4 Reviews: Jen	Dream of You #4.5 Reviews: Jen
Forever with You #5 Reviews: Jen	Fire in You #6 Reviews: Jen

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BOOK REVIEW: Sacred (Kenzie & Gennaro #3) by Dennis Lehane

September 22, 2015 / Chelsea / 0 Comments

Sacred (Kenzie & Gennaro #3)
by Dennis Lehane
Purchase on: Amazon
Add to: Goodreads

Synopsis:
Dennis Lehane won a Shamus Award for A Drink Before the War, his first book about working-class Boston detectives Patrick Kenzie and Angie Gennaro. His second in the series, Darkness, Take My Hand, got the kind of high octane reviews that careers are made of. Now Lehane not only survives the dreaded third-book curse, he beats it to death with a stick.Sacred is a dark and dangerous updating of Raymond Chandler's The Big Sleep, as dying billionaire Trevor Stone hires Kenzie and Gennaro to find his daughter, Desiree. Patrick's mentor, a wonderfully devious detective named Jay Becker, has already disappeared in St. Petersburg, Florida, while working the case, so the two head there to pick up a trail. Desiree, of course, is nothing like the sweet and simple beauty described by her father, and even Chandler would have been amazed by the plot twists that Lehane manages to keep coming.

Maybe honor was in its twilight. Maybe it had always been heading that way. Or worse, maybe it had always been an illusion.

Everyone is suspect. Everyone is suspect.
It was starting to become my mantra.

It goes without saying that I’m a picky little shit. I have rules upon rules, and I turn down rec after rec from friends because I am just that critical. It’s not because I don’t trust my friends…it’s more than that. Imagine knowing precisely what you want. And when you find it, your eyes light up and your heart goes into overdrive, and you feel lighter than air-You know that, without a doubt, this book will be perfect for you. And, I’ll tell ya, it’s a long, drawn out process for me. It is. So, when my friend said I’d love this, I tried it…but didn’t particularly fall for the first book.

Once again, my perspective of prior events was reshaping, transmogrifying, reinventing itself until I felt increasingly stupid for ever trusting my initial instincts.
This case, I swear.

It was good, sure. I loved the main characters, of course. But the story itself? I found it lacking-Not because it wasn’t well-written…it was. But, the things they had to investigate bored me a tad and I wasn’t fully engrossed in the story-I didn’t get the obsession, is my point. It was a typical first book with intros type deal. So, without further adieu (Meaning I asked first if the second was better, shut up) I tried the second book.
“Mr. Stone, you said you’d heard we had the two qualities you were looking for most.”
“Yes.”
“One was honesty. What’s the other?”
“I heard you were relentless,” he said as he stepped into the study. “Utterly relentless.”

A stalker/serial-killer story, deep, meaningful relationships between Patrick, Angie, and their friends growing, and the atmosphere becoming darker, eerier, creepier…I was like a moth to a flame. So, it goes without saying that I was super excited for book three. But, and don’t judge me, I am seriously addicted to the serial killer books and was a little put out that wasn’t in this story. I know, admit me to a hospital now. But it really and truly says something when the story isn’t centered around what I want…but becomes everything I could ever need.
I turned to Angie. “How you doing?”
“My wrists hurt and so does my head.”
“Otherwise?”
“I’m generally in a foul mood.”
I looked back into the light. “We’re in a foul mood.”
“I’d assume so.”
“Fuck you,” I said.

Plot: While not as cutthroat as book two, I was still 100% satisfied. Angie and Patrick don’t want to take any cases-they are laying low following the devastating events following the serial killer’s reign of terror. The darkness was eating at them, so they decided it was time to figure out what was important. And that’s all fine and good…until someone approaches them in a way they can’t refuse. Now, even though this case seemed mild, it became almost my favorite. Now, no, wait up, not over my serial killer fetish-Don’t fret. This case allowed for Angie and Patrick to explore their relationship and dig deeper and focus on, yes I know I’ve said it, what’s important. I just think that the details of this case helped to highlight the best parts of what make Angie and Patrick, well…Angie and Patrick. I got to see why everyone loved them not only separately, but together, and I loved it. There isn’t much I can say that I disliked about this story.

“I’d say that’s a clue,” I said.
“Big or small?”
“Depends whether you measure by width or length.”
I got a good dope-slap for that on the way out the door.

The Mystery: I touched base on it above, but I just wanted to zero in on the fact that it wasn’t as simple or mundane as I had first imagined. It was underhanded, crazy, and wholly addicting…I couldn’t put this book down to save my life…and this shocked me.
When the door closed behind them, I said, “Heel, Walter. Roll over, Walter.”
“Poor Walter,” Angie said as we reached the elevator bank.
“Poor Walter. Please. Could you have been any more breathy by the way?”
“Breathy?”
“‘Sex months,'” I said in my best Marilyn Monroe voice.
“I didn’t say ‘sex.’ I said ‘six.’ And I wasn’t that breathy.”
“Whatever you say, Norma Jean.”

The Characters: I adored Patrick before, but I fell even harder for him in this one-his humor, his wit, his personality…He was absolutely intoxicating. And, even more than that, I fell in love with Angie in this one, too. She hasn’t been a favorite of mine just yet, but I always liked her. But, in this one, she shined just like Patrick. Each page put a smile on my face (Well, except for the murder investigation, hmm?) and a ray of sunshine through my heart. Even Bubba had me smiling ear-to-ear, and Nelson, no matter how small their part.
Angie was where most of me began and all of me ended.

Overall? This is a definite contender for favorite of the series. It’s hard to explain, but I loved books two and three for totally different reasons. And, if I had to choose, yeah, I guess I would read this one more on an ‘over and over’ basis, if only to smile from ear to ear at Patrick and Angie’s antics. While 2 is probably my favorite for the plot (darkness, helplessness, never quite putting my finger on whodunnit, and the bone-chilling revelations that made me shiver long after each eerie scene), book three is my favorite for the characters. They shine and they do what they do best, and not once was I bored. That’s saying something for such long books.
“It bugs you.”
“A bit. It doesn’t feel right.”
She leaned back in her chair. “We in the trade call that feeling a ‘hunch.'”
I bent over my notes, pen in hand. “How do you spell that? With an ‘h,’ right?”

So, you know, shocking right? I am in love with yet another series. And damn it all to hell, I’m not finding anything else I want to read in-between. Ain’t that just the bitch of it? So, anyway, whenever I move onto book four, I will put my big girl pants on…because from what I hear? Shit’s about to get real messy…and sad. Very, very sad. I’m ready, book!
I looked up at the sky, such a rich dark shade of blue it seemed artificial. That was something else I’d been noticing down here: This state-so ripe and lush and colorful-seemed fake in comparison with its uglier counterparts up north.

There’s something ugly about the flawless.

*************************

Well…no sense lying about it…I’ve officially went into fangirl mode.

Alert the media.

Review to come.

BOOK REVIEW: Faking Normal (Faking Normal #1) by Courtney C. Stevens

September 17, 2015 / Chelsea / 0 Comments

Faking Normal (Faking Normal #1)
by Courtney C. Stevens
Purchase on: Amazon, iBooks
Add to: Goodreads

Synopsis:
An edgy, realistic, and utterly captivating novel from an exciting new voice in teen fiction.

Alexi Littrell hasn't told anyone what happened to her over the summer. Ashamed and embarrassed, she hides in her closet and compulsively scratches the back of her neck, trying to make the outside hurt more than the inside does.

When Bodee Lennox, the quiet and awkward boy next door, comes to live with the Littrells, Alexi discovers an unlikely friend in "the Kool-Aid Kid," who has secrets of his own. As they lean on each other for support, Alexi gives him the strength to deal with his past, and Bodee helps her find the courage to finally face the truth.

A searing, poignant book, Faking Normal is the extraordinary debut novel from an exciting new author-Courtney C. Stevens.

Now there are tears in my eyes. “I’ll make you a promise, Bodee. Long as you’re with my family, you won’t run out of Kool-Aid.”

He blinks up at me. “And I promise you, I’ll stop whoever’s hurting you.

This book was perfection. I didn’t know what I wanted, but somehow this book always went exactly in that right direction-it went where I didn’t even realize I wanted to go, and that, to me, is amazing. Just wow. Perfectly perfect– It’s not often I find myself grinning like a deranged loon in the dark back drop of our bedroom after the lights go out.

I mean, lots of books make me happy, everyone knows that, but it’s rare to feel such strong, giddy feels that you can’t contain a smile too big for your face. Those moments are unheard of, fleeting, almost non-existent. And I guess it’s even more surprising because of the content of this novel. It wasn’t light or fluffy or full of rainbows (well, I lie, Bodee’s hair was a myriad of colors throughout the book), yet it made me feel happy all throughout. And I think that’s the making of a true author-turning something horrible into something hopeful.

Me: a girl who was raped. Him: a boy whose dad killed his mom.
Us: a girl and boy who survive.

Last Friday I was on the search for a book that would help me get through the moments where I haven’t had time to read my lengthier novels lately. I already had decided I was taking a break from the series I was on, seeing as I was ruining the epicness of it, and wanted something that was more like what I had been obsessed about throughout the summer. I don’t know how to say this without sounding ridiculous, but, I’ve been in the mood for books that aren’t….quite….right. Like, for instance, my absolute favorites this year have been all over the board like I Hunt Killers to realistic drama such as Some Girls Are all the way to realistic fiction centered around mental health (I know, it sounds so bad spelled out like that) like this book here, or My Heart and Other Black Holes. Things like that. And don’t even get me started on my dystopian and fantasy favs this year-we’ll be here all day. Anyway, I knew I needed a good book…I just didn’t know what.

If only I could make the outside hurt more than the inside.

I was scrolling through the feed and saw someone reading this-it was a book I had passed up a year ago, or who knows how long, and all of a sudden I was curious. My tastes have changed quite a bit, even from September 2014-September 2015. It’s so funny to me how you just know what you love and then all of a sudden you are reading completely different things and rolling your eyes at what you used to love. I am so fickle. But, as it is, I am obsessed with this new and interesting genre (for me it’s new) and don’t see myself giving it up too easily. It almost always touches me deeply in ways I never imagined possible, and there is always so much heart. These books have depth that is so hard to find these days..and I can’t get enough of them.

A wad of crime scene tape, meant for the trash. Left behind.
My mind wraps the same yellow tape around the pool in our backyard.
What if I had called the police? What if everyone knew a crime had been committed? Everything would be different. Everything is different-even without the yellow tape.

I didn’t know if I’d love this or not…but I had a good feeling, you know? It popped up on my feed and it just felt right. This is the story of a girl who has a secret. A girl who, despite her front, is broken. She goes through day to day life, smiling and nodding and acting as if nothing in the world is wrong….when, in reality, everything is. Something happened to her over the summer, something that irrevocably changed her life forever, aging her beyond her years. She longs to be normal, to not want to continually cause herself harm to repress the horrible recounts of that fateful night…but, really, she just wants to move on and
forget.

Once I’m behind two closed doors, I curl into a ball and suck in the familiar smell of the closet carpet. When I can’t make myself smaller, I cry and pound my fist on the floor. There’s an art to crying without a sound, and I’m a master.

If you don’t like books where the main character causes harm to themselves or where rape is a factor in the story, this won’t be for you. I’ve never had to deal with these issues, nor have I ever met anyone who does, but I felt the pain, the deep hurt, our MC felt on every single page-That fear of other men and the self loathing that came with the doubt of her resolve-or lack thereof-in the matter. She blames herself for not saying no and for letting it happen….but what she doesn’t realize is it’s not her fault, it was never her fault, and it never will be her fault. And I guess I’ll never know if the author handled it correctly, but, to me, it all seemed right.

Something is hiding in my childhood. Something off.

Keeping this monumental secret is taking a huge toll on her. She doesn’t smile without it being forced, her neck is in shreds (secretly), and she walks through the halls with no sense of purpose, just going through the motions. I didn’t know what role her friends would really play in this-they seemed almost like the type to cause problems, in the beginning-but as the story progressed, you could see how much they cared for her, how they would do anything to keep her happy, and how they noticed….but didn’t know how deeply her hurt went. They have their flaws, but what person doesn’t?

The rape has devastated places in me that even Bodee’s magic can’t fix. If he were to put his heart in my hand, he might never find it again. And I’m not cruel enough to let him break while he tries to heal the impossible.

And I think it goes without saying that I loved a boy in this story, hmm? His name is Bodee, and he was perfect-literally. He was perfect. I have not one complaint with this caring boy-He was beautiful, inside and out. But, he has his own personal tragedy-his mother was murdered by his father, and it weighs on him every single day. At the start of the book, we open with Bodee’s mother’s funeral. Lexi’s parents, being good friends of his mother, offer to let him stay at their house since he really doesn’t have anywhere else to go, making Bodee and Lexi closer than they ever could have imagined.

”She’ll take Collie back, so….be careful.”
“Thanks, Lex, but my sights aren’t on Heather.”
“You have sights?”
“Every guy with a heartbeat has sights,” he says.
“Who’s in yours?” My heartbeat betrays my calm voice, and this close, I know Bodee can feel it spike.
“Well, now”-he flashes me the coy grin that I love and rarely see-“you have your secrets, and I have mine.”

I think what I liked most about their relationship, though, was how they both did their best to try and help the other heal. And, even more than that, Bodee was an outcast at school-‘Kool-Aid Kid’, as they call him, and had no friends-it was utterly heart-breaking and soul -wrenching seeing him explore his new found friendship with Lexi-and Heather and Liz, by default. Even more than that, though, I loved seeing his protectiveness of Lexi-his best (and sometimes only) friend. It was absolutely adorable. I wanted to reach in the book and steal him for myself, hug him until all his pain went away….but now I’m getting creepy, and that just won’t do. So…moving on.
”Alexi…I know…I don’t know you well enough to ask, but….could you, I mean, would you maybe…help me with something on the way to your house?”
The starts and stops, the painstaking precision of words, and the sheer length of time it takes him to ask make it clear that this boy never asks anyone for help.
Bring out the dull knitting needles, stabbing my heart, again.

They aren’t perfect-far from it-but they are trying to move forward with their lives-Or, in Lexi’s case, to forget-and are doing it together. Two souls who lost themselves along the way…guiding each other back to the light. I know a lot of people hate the ‘love cures all’ trope, but I don’t know that that was the case here. I think it was more of a guidance and healing type venture, and it was utterly heart-warming to see how they grew, each giving the other strength where they couldn’t gather it themselves. I fell in love with them together as well as when they were apart…their story is one I can say I won’t forget quickly, like I do with a lot of books. I really and truly fell in love with them-permanently.

If a heart can smile, mine does.
“Bodee, thanks,” I say, though I know he doesn’t need it. “I’m sorry you lost her.”
“At least I found you,” he says.

I think it goes without saying, though, that there was plenty I had a problem with. Well, one thing, really: Kayla, her sister. What a bitch. I’m sorry, but no sister should ever come at their sibling like that. It was disgusting, vile, and completely uncalled for. I must admit, though, I liked what the sour taste added to the story-I’m not sure why. Maybe I liked the diversity. Maybe I liked that things were that much more complicated, or maybe it’s because I got to see Bodee, the knight in shining armor….either way, I loved it.

Bodee Lennox is never really anything. I’ll bet most kids in our class didn’t know his name before the murder. And yet his face is not expressionless the way I once thought. That slight twitch of lips, a little half grin, says more than Heather does in a week. But the full-teeth smile, the one I saw today at his house, is like a work of Tolstoy.

And then finally, the Captain Lyrics angle. I loved this. Not necessarily the lyrics, per se, but the idea of who was behind it. Yeah yeah, there’s really only two or three people it could be, but don’t you love a little side of mystery to go along with your story? I mean, a predictable mystery, but, mystery nonetheless-knowing you know who it is but still wanting to play along anyway…it was too cute. Gah I already want to re-read this!

Faking normal is a skill I learned seventy-seven days ago, but tonight it’s going to require everything I have.

So, anyway, that’s all. There was a ton I wanted to say even though I really didn’t know how to say it. I think my long intros have a lot to do with me stalling and trying to find the right ways to express how much I really and truly loved something. I’m not perfect, my review isn’t perfect, but I loved this book and I wanted to do it up right for Bodee and Lexi. I hope you all can find something you like about this review that will make you want to give this one a try. And if not…oh well, I tried.

…5 hours of tortuous wait until I could finally read
…4 interruptions once I started
…3 (million) giggles and sighs
…2 hours of lost sleep I’ll never get back so I could finish this at any cost
…1 brilliant story…and a very happy Chelsea.

I never understood life could be so dramatically sectioned, but it can. And is. There is only after. And before.